The Who's and The How's Part II

Sorry you guys, after waking and resting, got lil carried away (forgot i had blog *grins...well something like that *winks)...anyhoos, back to the "main" stuffs...where was i...

Well after knowing all Mr.Peanut was about...i asked him one day if he REALLY loved me or not, know what he said? "I know how much you don't want be lied to, so i would get back to you on that..." morofucker thought i'ld wait for him...at same time he was all over his ex and was trying hide it...and i proved to him i was much more than that! After him went out briefly with two guys, so brief i think it was a one month thing each, nothing drastic happend (well kinda...would tell some other time) but setteled with one, not among the two i mentioned though, a total different one!! Let's call him Tallie (man he's TALL! - more like from one hell to another...)
Tallie was sweet and all, from the get go (aren't they always? *rolling eyes..) then something happend between his cousins girl (more like bed mate) and the dude (dude = his cousin).. One lonely lecturerless, friendless, livielyless....in short BORING day, i went over her flat with another friend of Tallies. We got in sat and started talking, normal talks...then the bed mate got a call (LOL! don't know what else call her...*grins) it was Tallies cousin, after dropping she kept going on and on about them being brids of same feather and all, i think he pissed her off about something, but seriously what more do you want as a "bed-mate" and is not like she didn't know....she KNEW he had a girl (pathetic if you ask me) anyways though, he pissed her off and she was letting it out to us...one thing led to antoher, she ended up telling me all stuffs she sees Tallie doing, all the girls she see him with at clubs and so. I felt like shit, coz i was like Tallies different and she was like "oh please girl, OPEN your eyes!!" and then it made so much sense in that lil conversation, it explained ALOT! I couldn't take it in, had puked it out...i was throwing out the lil i ate that day on spot! I was purely shocked couldn't even do much, ate less, talked less, got sick...and so much other kinda stress for days! Being me as i am, i couldn't keep it to myself, i confronted him.
Natrurally he acted like he didn't know anything about it, then started accepting...this whole thing got serious coz his cousin went and started beating up the poor girl (and guess what? she still kept opening her legs to him...(some girls don't even have PRIDE in their dictionaries i guess...) anyways, we went through all that and kept going with my eyes WIDE open obviously...so open i even show up his place without annocing my arrival...
Meanwhile our dear friend Mr.Peanut started dating Preicous (so i heard from another ex-group member that still wants date me...infact wanted ask me out before Mr.Peanut came along, tough luck i guess...i can't date my boyfriends friends or whatever, don't know why, just one of my principles....) anythough, they kinda got a thing going...this is people the very SAME guy that dated her sister, then hooked me up with, then takes to her bloody self (sicken if you ask me)...Back to Tallie!
I went over his place one day and there he was with another! He didn't really let me see her, or come ANY where near her (knowing me as he does) i only saw what i saw of her when they kept peeking through the window looking at me...then when he finally came open the door, he didn't let me in and kept asking me come with him to buy something (just so that when foolishly i follow, she would leave, without me seeing her...unh unh! hey had another thing coming!) Yours turly sat there and fought...and i mean FOUGHT!it also got was nasty...and funny too, (LOL!) colliding with the rolling on floor i kept doing (coz they wanted to froce me go in the car with him, and i didn't wanna!! i had to see who the bitch was!! (by 'they' i meant he and his older cousin).
After all that drama, followed dilemas and drastic come backs! i some how couldn't let him go...then we kept going, and things got worst, better, worst, better then worst again.
Then MONTHS later, after our move. He finally tells me who she really was, coz at the time he kept saying it was this person, that person....was sister of his friend. I always called that his friend a PIMP! The guy keeps hooking him up with girls, and finally landed on his own sisters (irritatates the SHIT outta me!!)...
Tallie said he didn't want me see her coz he knew i might think otherwise, that she just came over with the friend and stayed back, and they started talking, but nothing happened. Then i asked him why would she stay if she didn't have a reason to? he then confronts to me, what they had, but that nothing more than a mere kiss would have happend...hmmmmm (y'al thinking what am thinking??!!) At this point i lost it!! How DARE he tells me that??!!
Then told him about my ugly lil secert too....back when i was messed up and hurt from what his cousins bed-mate told me, i went over another old friends place and ended up kissing him...though i left before anything happend and told him ALOT went down!! LOL! Just get him pissed...and he did! LOL! Used that to leave him...but even that wasn't enough, coz after a while he came back saying he had forgaven me (is that a word...who cares!)... I was like WTF??!
(even though is was kinda sweet of him) but then i still knew deep down it was all the beginning of the end for us...
Anyways, i later on told him i lied (like months later!)...and we laughed it off...but like i said it wouldn't have work out coz with the distance and all, it would just make things TEN MILLION times harder!! I then met another piece of HELL! Let's call him....ummmm....lets see....errrr....how about just HIM (coz he is just him, and i can't think of a better name as of now).
HIM was one of the reasons why i let Tallie go, even after his constent begging....and my constent no's...we FNALLY broke up after NINE months of breaking and making (with Tallie that is)...and at this time he didn't know i knew about his new girl...story for another day!!

I've written too much and really exhausted, guessing you are too from all the reading....anyways this WHOLE blog thing and my name "tears" came from all the heartaches i went through but mostly though, was coz of HIM! So my next post would be all about the current events, a lil about how Tallie and Mr.Peanut ended up...and about some daily issues i go through, mostly caused by HIM....would try to be updating often this time (not really a promise *grins so don't be dissappointed)
Enjoy! xx

The Who's and The How's..

I know there are alot of girls that went through alot because of love. But i feel like am the only one that is going FUCKING insane of it...the shits WACK!
Lemme break it down to you...i've had two (plus recnt one, making it three) experiences of bad love in my life (not many enough to complain about right?well to me it is..).I never really fancy love much and all its fancy pancy stuffs...(what the HELL am i talking bout right?)well then lemme take some time to explain...
For YEARS i watched romantic movies,read about it,heard about it and watched how it tore the hearts,souls and spirits of its victims with its venomous claws...i was just then an aduience to these tragic scenes,never really intended to join the "gang". For eight years of knowing love and what's about,i choose to stay single (and one HELL of a scared one!) till the day i got in the Uni. I was SUCH a typical JJC then ( so my nigerian friends say!) BIG time!! anways...to make a long story even longer,i met my first boyfriend through a "friend" (so it seemed to me then...), lets call her Preicous (from the whole good and evil of the ring in the Lord of the Rings...) and we'ld call him Mr.Peanut (basically implied to emptyness of the brain!).
The very first time i saw Mr.Peanut,i had NO what so ever feelings for him, just thought he was kinda cute and all...nothing more, nothing lesser than more...We hung out every day, Preicous, Mr.Peanut, Precious' sister, Mr.Peanuts friend and me...we were a cool group (gosh those days...) Till one day Precious told me...hold up...actually she was trying use her second sense to get it out of me that i liked him (see why it was her second sense? coz it didn't work..) i kept obivously saying No to her, but she made it to some kinda CSI investigation and started using other tactics...which also never worked. He may have asked her to, coz he like prob thinks there's NO girl out there that would set eyes on him and NOT fancy him....but along came Tears and broke the hidious record...
So anyways, i told Precious what i felt then, that i just thought him to be cute and that was IT! not knowing that was the it she's been waiting for. She then tells me that he appearantly liked me...and asked me if i wanted to go out with him...and i asked her if he some how lost his voice and could only speak in sign language which he has yet to master and could in NO way communicate with anyone but her...some how...and therefore could not tell me this himself. She cracked and said "no", just that he confindes in her alot...and she took the liberty, on her own, to ask me coz she thought we could make a great couble...this SAME guy that broke up with her sister...(story for another day...the end gets better)...so, i was like, "let him be a man and tell me his bloody self" (i hate when men do that...)
Weeks later he tells me in the most riduculious way EVER...so i was like "you not trying hard enough"...coz for some bizarre reason, he made it sound like he would be doing me a favour by going out with me...so the next time he tried (which was weeks later), it was more human and more respectful. then i just accepted with a nod...coz to tell you the turth, i developed feelings for him by then...which made my pride a lil weaker than usual....
So we started out well....three months later he becomes a big time ARSE!!Told me he was a playa and all about would change for me (lesson number one: NEVER believe a single letter a playa uses to form words with...all lies!!). He told me he didn't want losse me. Told me he has a secret to reveil...that he was a cultist...i never really knew what that was all about,he kinda had to break it down to me.What they do to babies (tooooo nasty for me to put back in words), when, how and to whom!!...i wasn't all that scared though...which i think he wanted me to...just wondered how nasty and heartless one could be (should have taken the hint right???...well) i was sooo blinded with love that nothing was visible for me... (Lesson number two: NEVER get weak in love!!)...

Gosh! am exhusated from all this typing...to be continued...sorry guys, girls gotta SLEEP!!